Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Batman vs. The Christmas Spirit Opossum


Trust me, he looks worse than he is...

Ah, the opossum. The Frenchmen of the Animal Kingdom. While that surly-looking fellow seen above is just chilling on a fence or something, the opossum are famous for laying down and pretending to be dead as a way to escape predators. What they do when they come across a predator who has no problem eating something he didn't kill himself, I have no idea. Still, "playing possum" seems to work for these little guys. And right now, it seems to be working for my Christmas spirit as well.

Last Monday, I posted a blog kicking off the Christmas season for me, a season I very much look forward to every year. Twenty-four hours after that, life sort of went to hell in a handcart, and my Christmas spirit was tied to the bumper of the handcart like tin cans to a wedding limo. A few days ago, though, I was catching up on some of the comic books I had missed over the last two weeks ago, and came across a graphic novel that maybe... just maybe... started pulling my Christmas spirit back from the depths of Hades...


Batman: Noel is a graphic novel that just came out recently from DC Comics. I'll pause for a minute to let any of my friends who know how I feel stop and gasp over the fact that I'm about to say something nice about a DC project. This roughly ninety-page story is basically a version of A Christmas Carol that puts Batman squarely in the role of Ebenezer Scrooge. There will be spoilers ahoy here, so if you don't want to know, get out now while the gettings good.

The story starts with an unknown narrator telling someone that he's going to tell them a story, but that he isn't good at that kind of thing. As he starts telling us the story of Bob Cratchit and his son and his horrible boss Scrooge, we see a man who is a small-time bagman for "The Clown," being terrorized by Batman, who lets him go to use as bait. He pauses to notice the bagman left the money he was supposed to be carrying behind and, without concern, notes the the Clown won't forgive him for that. We then see an example of Batman in his Batcave, being mean to trusty Alfred, showing just how driven and Scrooge-like he is. He sees a Robin suit in his display case (I presume it's the suit of Jason Todd, the second Robin who was killed by the Joker, but they never specify). This is his Jacob Marley moment, folks.

Or the Marley Brothers, if you prefer the Muppets. That's Michael Caine as Scrooge...
didn't he play Alfred too? Wait a minute...

Soon after that, he receives a tip from Commissioner Gordon, which leads him to Catwoman, his Ghost of Christmas Past. She leads him on a merry, flirtatious chase which he wants no part of, as she reminds him of how much fun they used to have when they were younger. At the end of the chase, he takes a nasty tumble off of a gargoyle and is rescued by none other than... Superman. Who better to be the Ghost of Christmas Present for Scrooge McBats than his friend, the Big Blue Buffoon? He flies around with Supes, taking in the happier sights of Gotham, like Commissioner Gordon celebrating Christmas with his wife and an on-duty cop as they say nice things about the Dark Knight. He even checks in on the bagman he terrorized earlier and watches as he plays with his son. Superman drops Batman off at the Batmobile and flies off, right before the Batmobile explodes.

No, Superman, with his super-hearing, doesn't hear that and fly right back. Sure, that would make sense. But this is the world of comic books, people, leave sense at the door. Besides, if Supes flew back, Bats couldn't be confronted by the scariest of the visions, the Ghost of Christmas Future. And really, who else could that vision for Batman be but the Joker?

Why so serious? It's Christmas!

Joker, as silent at the Ghost of Christmas Present should be, drags Batman off and drops him in an open grave, where he experiences visions of Gotham's future without him... Alfred lost and alone, gang warfare everywhere, Gordon in chains for harboring a fugitive vigilante... before finally dragging himself out as a better man. He hurries to the home of the bagman from the beginning, arriving in time to stop Joker from killing the man's son to make up for losing his money at the start of the story. After a brief scuffle, he looks up to find the bagman with a gun to the Joker's head, wanting to kill him for threatening his son. Batman, in his full-on changed Ebenezer Scrooge moment, goes from thinking earlier the bagman was scum and his son had no hope of turning out any better to saying to the bagman, "Put down the gun. Show your son what a real hero, a real man, does." The bagman listens, Batman takes Joker away, and everyone is happy. We also find out, although it was fairly obvious, that it was the bagman narrating the story of Scrooge to his son the whole time.

The story has it's drawbacks; namely, the writing, by Lee Bermejo, is pretty simplistic, but that's because Bermejo is mainly an artist, and his art on the book is beautiful (he also worked on another Batman graphic novel, The Joker, which was written by Brian Azzarello and might be the second greatest Joker story ever, behind The Killing Joke). The story itself is nicely done though, and is a good adaptation of the classic story.

In the end, how did Batman fare against my opossum-like Christmas spirit? Not well. Even with reinforcements from a great Glee Christmas episode last night, the soundtrack of which I'm listening to as I type this, current events still have my Christmas spirit nearly nonexistent.

But the Caped Crusader never gives up, and neither will I.

Monday, December 5, 2011

'Tis the Season...

We're just under three weeks to Christmas... or an even three weeks to Festivus if that is more your cup of tea... so I thought it would be a good time to let you all in on the things I watch pretty much every year to get into the Christmas spirit. Despite what a cranky, cantankerous bastard I am all year long, I do love Christmas and celebrating it with my family and friends. This is going to be another picture-heavy affair, I hope you enjoy these. No, I don't, I don't care, I enjoy them, that's all that matters. How's that for Christmas spirit! Now here, in no particular order, are the TV shows and movies that help me do that!

The Family Man

 
Yeah, I know. Nic Cage. It's incredibly hokey. And did I mention Nic Cage? But it's sweet and sentimental and funny sometimes too and I like it so shut up!

Bad Santa


Specifically the "Badder Santa" version. Absolutely hysterical.

Roswell Christmas Episodes


The very underrated Roswell had Christmas episodes in its second and third seasons, "A Roswell Christmas Carol" and "Samuel Rising." Each are incredibly sweet, well-written episodes that are full of the Christmas spirit, but "A Roswell Christmas Carol" is the better of the two.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer - "Amends"


This third season episode is the only Christmas episode they ever did, a poignant story about redemption that is one of my favorite episodes of the whole series. Foreshadowing the series' biggest villains and the final season, laying the foundation for the "Angel" spin-off, and asking questions about whether we can ever really make up for the awful things we do... well, anytime it snows in California, you've probably got your answer.

Doctor Who - A Christmas Carol


Sure, I know it's not the only Doctor Who Christmas Special, but it's the only one that actually centers around Christmas, with the Doctor staging a Dickensian-style intervention on a Scrooge of his own, played by Michael Friggin' Dumbledore Gambon. This is the episode that finally got me to jump onto the Doctor Who bandwagon, and I can't wait for this year's "The Doctor, the Widow, and the Wardrobe," which is obviously an adaptation of...

The Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe


Sure, I know it's technically not Christmasy, but it feels like it to me. Leave me alone.

A Christmas Carol

Specifically, this...


and this...


...each for reasons that should need no explanations whatsoever.

The Lord of the Rings


Nothing to do with Christmas at all, I realize. And yet, because the movies came out in late December and I went to see them with my friends, my brain associates the trilogy with the Christmas season, so you can rest assured at some point in the next twenty days or so, I'll spend an entire day watching these three movies.

The Rankin-Bass Christmas Specials.

Any of them really, I love them all. But "A Year Without a Santa Claus" will always be my favorite because of Heat Miser and Snow Miser...


A Charlie Brown Christmas


I saved the best for last, and of course this is on the top of the list. Anyone who isn't instantly overwhelmed with the Christmas spirit after watching this just has no soul. By the way, it's going to be on ABC in about 12 minutes. How's that for Christmas synergy?

Friday, December 2, 2011

My TV Fave Five

Yeah, I know it's Friday, and technically I should be posting a Fiction Friday installment. I might still do that later, there's an idea I'm kicking around in my head but it has to take shape a little bit more before I can do anything with it. While I ruminate on that, I thought since I spend so much time talking about television, I should let me faithful readers in on my favorite TV shows of all time, especially since I just realized this list has changed dramatically in the last few years from what i always thought it was. I've always said my favorite shows were Quantum Leap, Babylon 5, Saved by the Bell, Boy Meets World, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel (I count them as one show, for obvious reasons). Now that I'm almost thirty-one, the level of amazing television I've been exposed to over the last decade or so has changed this list dramatically. So, here we go! And yes, this is going to be a photo/video-heavy blog.

5.) How I Met Your Mother


The fact that I ignored this show's existence for so long shows that I'm clearly an idiot. I didn't start watching HIMYM until some friends of mine recommended it to me over and over again. Finally, over a sick weekend where I barely ever left my bed, I downloaded the first three seasons and watched them all in three days. I was hooked. At its best, HIMYM is full of equal parts heart and humor... and at its worst, it's just hysterical with the legend... wait for it... ary Neil Patrick Harris stealing just about every minute he's on screen with his antics as Barney Stinson.

I totally apply this rule to my personal life...

Aside from a whole lot of comedy and romance within the overarching mystery of just who Ted Mosby is going to marry and when the hell he'll meet her already, HIMYM has given us such gems as the Bro Code, the above Hot Crazy Scale, "Suit Up!", Robin Sparkles, Ranjit the Taxi/Limo Driver, Swarley,... the list goes on. My personal favorite being Slap Bet, which of course led to Slapsgiving...

HAPPY SLAPS-GIVING! from Rich Shook on Vimeo.

Oh, and spoiler alert... it's the only show on the list that is actually still on, so you should watch it.

4.) The West Wing

I was going to use a full cast photo, but, c'mon, he's Martin Sheen!

Sure, the show was naive as hell, creating an administration that was far too idealistic to ever actually exist in American government. And sure, it dropped off a bit after creator/writer Aaron Sorkin left at the end of the fourth season. Criticisms aside, the show was built and carried on the back of solid acting performances from an incredibly talented cast and some of the most amazing, snappy, smart dialogue I've ever seen. People who have read my writing will say that dialogue is what I'm best at, and Sorkin's writing style on this show has a lot to do with that. Here's one of my favorite examples of why I love this show:


If only we had real presidents that awesome...

3.) Friday Night Lights


Anyone who's known me over the last five years knew this was going to be on the list. I watched the first episode when it aired on a whim because it was a Wednesday night and there was nothing else on, and I was hooked from the first moment. Nominally about a high school football team, this is a show about anything but. Life, love, growing up, family... all the bases are covered. The show really centers around Coach Taylor and his family, as well as the kids on his team and their friends/girlfriends/family. Coach Taylor, by the way, is easily one of the greatest television characters ever. While it never really caught on in the ratings, this was a show so beloved by its fans and critics everywhere that for the first time, a major network split the costs of a show with a channel on DTV and let them air episodes in the fall, followed by NBC then airing those episodes as a summer replacement for the last three of the show's five seasons. The show was just too good to cancel. I wanted to show you a clip that proves that, but NBC is apparently a tightass about FNL clips online, so you get this instead:


2.) Scrubs

Easily the funniest show I've ever watched. i can literally watch episodes of this over and over again. It's hysterical, full of heart, with great characters, and it never really goes the way you expect. It's a show that embodies the phrase "from the ridiculous to the sublime." Plus, Percival Ulysses Cox, M.D., is another of TV's greatest characters. Not counting the final bastardized season, it had an almost perfect run, punctuated by what I think is the greatest closing sequence of a series finale ever:


Boy, that was short. Can you tell I'm out of steam?

1.) Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel


I don't think this one is ever changing. There's nothing I could say about these two shows that I haven't already said, and I'm tired of writing. Joss Whedon is my master now. That is all. The end. Grr, argh.

Like any of these shows? Hate any of them? Want to tell me what your faves are? That's what the comments section is for... hop to it, people!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The Thankful Stormtrooper

I had intended to write this list of things I'm thankful for on Thursday, but I woke up that morning feeling like a hot bag of ass and have just today begun to feel better, if only marginally. It's still Thanksgiving weekend, though, so it still counts, right?

I'm thankful for my new phone. After almost four years, half with a crappy Samsung and half with an only-slightly-less-crappy HTC, to finally be back in the LG family, with a Droid, no less, is just nice.

I'm thankful for writing. Between the wonderfully brilliant writers behind the novels, comics, TV shows, and movies I love so much and the ability to write and the way it lets me vent my feelings and frustrations and ideas... yeah. Writing rocks. I always say this, but I really do need to keep up with the idea of doing it more often.

I'm incredibly thankful to John Jameson.

I'm thankful for my family, especially my grandparents. Enormous pains in my ass, but I love them anyway.

I'm thankful for perseverance. Between the fruitless job search, a cashlessness that is only just above poverty and a completely nonexistent love life, there are a lot of times... A LOT of times... where I feel like just saying "screw it" and giving up. But I never do. So I'm incredibly thankful for that.

Lastly, I'm thankful for my friends, specifically the special handful of people I can count on to be real friends. Much like my family, they can be a pain in the ass... but they are the stars in what is otherwise the dark night sky of my life, and I appreciate it more than I can ever say.

Alright, enough of this earnest crap, can I get back to being snarky and irreverent now?

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Fiction Friday - Two Goodreads Quotes For You.

No new fiction to share this week. Instead, I'm just posting two quote I came across on goodreads.com (Like to read? Go there! Sign up! Friend me! Or, you know, don't. Whichever.) that I really like from one of my favorite authors. The first is just an awesome quote. The second does a good job of explaining why there's nothing new to share this week.



quotes Jim likes


"Things need not have happened to be true. Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."— Neil Gaiman


quotes Jim likes


"Being a writer is a very peculiar sort of a job: it's always you versus a blank sheet of paper (or a blank screen) and quite often the blank piece of paper wins."— Neil Gaiman


Because blogger is being really weird with the html for the quotes tonight, you might need to refresh the page a few times to see both quotes instead of one of them repeated twice. Smart html, my ass...

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

The Job Search Tango

Have you ever danced with someone you were really attracted to and all you wanted to do was kiss them in the middle of the dance, like some big romantic scene right out of a movie that probably starred Katherine Heigl or someone equally ridiculous? There's a problem, though; everytime you go to kiss them, something in the dance itself gets in your way. There's a spin, or a twirl... or in some cases a dip that ends in someone getting dropped on their ass. Sounds fun, right? I mean, if you're a masochist. Otherwise, it sounds like hell.

And that is exactly what job-hunting in today's world is like: an unending, nightmarish job search tango. Think about it for a second.

This has absolutely nothing to do with anything. I just love Brittany S. Pierce.

You start off by finding someone you want to dance with and then ask them to dance; you submit your resume. If they like what they read, you come in for an interview, and the dance begins. You're dressed to impress. You already know what's coming, all the steps to the dance: why did you leave your last job? What are your goals? Your strengths? Weaknesses? What makes you right for this position? Why should I keep dancing with you? Maybe they throw a few movies in that you weren't expecting... you think it's a waltz and they start breaking...

The obligatory Breakin' 2 reference.

and you're caught flat-footed. Does anybody really know how to answer "If someone wrote a biography about you, what do you think the title should be?" No. But you keep dancing. Because if you stop dancing early, you don't get the job.

In the old days, in the time of sock-hops and malt shoppes, you'd either get that kiss or get dropped in the dip at the end of the first dance. People would get hired or not at the end of the first interview. Now, though, in the days of flash mobs and trance clubs, there's no such thing as a kiss in the first dance... but you can sure get dropped on your ass. If you manage to stay on your feet, that special someone you want takes your number, and maybe they'll call you back for another dance, with different steps and rhythm and even more surprises. Or you'll never hear from them again. See, there's an even bigger problem than anything else.

You're not the only person trying to dance with them. It's not like Saved by the Bell, where Kelly just has to pick between Zack and Slater.

Love triangles and bizarre Drivers' Ed cars do not mix.

No, in today's economy it's more like you're trying to dance with Cinderella, and so is everyone else in the whole damn kingdom. With tens of thousands of people unemployed now, competition is fiercer than ever. In a perfect world, luck wouldn't play into it, but it does. Sometimes Cinderella picks someone to dance with before you even get her attention. The only thing you can do is find another partner and keep on dancing.

But I have to be honest, I've never been a big dancer, and my feet are killing me.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Goodreads Book Review - The Walking Dead: Rise of the Governor

The Walking Dead: Rise of the GovernorThe Walking Dead: Rise of the Governor by Robert Kirkman

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


A few good moments mixed in with a lot of boring, repetitive, predictable moments. I'm forced to think that Bonansinga did most of the heavy lifting on this novel as it never really feels like it's part of The Walking Dead world, in terms of tone. It tries to get there though, mostly through a lot of graphic, depraved actions, the kind of which the comic is famous for... except the things that happen in the comic always feel earned, unlike a lot of the acts in this novel. Lastly, I don't want to give away the twist at the end, but I have to say that while it doesn't contradict anything we learn about the Governor in the comic, I don't like it one bit.



View all my reviews