Mets Monday, Vol. 12

So I've missed a couple of weeks here. First, I took a Monday off for the All-Star Break because, well, if everyone else was, why couldn't I? Then I missed a week because of new job stuff and whatnot. I almost missed today as well, but that was because I don't have the stomach to write about the Mets right now, that's how pathetic they've been since the second half of the season. All I can say right now is that the Mets really do stink, and if it doesn't change in a hurry, their season is going to end a lot sooner than it ends, if you know what I mean...

The Week's Best, for the week of 7-19-10 to 7-25-10

I think this week has been the hardest I've had, in terms of putting this list together. Despite some fairly big releases (including a few by Bendis, who normally wins whenever he has a book out), none of this week's books really moved me at all. But, I shall do my best...

The Weel's Worst Comic Book - Lady Deadpool One-Shot

Ah, the ruination of Deadpool continues. Aside from the four titles starring Deadpool that came out this month, there's this mess of a one-shot starring a female version of Deadpool that is absolutely ridiculous, with atrocious art that is only surpassed by it's horrendous writing and plotting. I miss the days when Deadpool was handled well as a character and written brilliantly... so, basically, I miss Fabian Nicieza.

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Angelus #4

Ron Marz has pretty much been the head "farmer" in the Top Cow Universe for a few years now, and his world-building continues with this Witchblade spin-off that continues to tell the story of Dani Baptiste, her girlfriend Finch, the Angelus Warriors, the Thirteen Artifacts, and the Darkness himself, Jackie Estacado. All that and beautifully rendered art by Stjepan Sejic, and this book is a definite winner.

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - DV8 - Gods and Monsters#4

Have you ever wondered what would happen if a super-powered team comprised of people who were... morally dubious, to say the least... was dropped onto a planet whose natives were prehistoric? If you're anything like me, you probably have, and if you're anything like me, you'll absolutely love the job Brian Wood and Rebekah Isaacs are doing on this book. I can't say enough about how awesome this series is, so I won't bother trying. Just check it out, you won't be disappointed.

The Week's Best, for the week of 7-12-10 to 7-18-10

This is going to be a "day late and a dollar short" edition, as the "real" week's best for last week was my ass finally getting a job. That has royally screwed up my sleeping habits this week since I need to start getting up at about 6:40am every morning now. So, this is going to be a wordless edition because I still have a Mets Monday to do today (I missed last week's column) and I'm just flat-out tired. Enjoy!

The Week's Worst Comic Book - Titans #25

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Superman #701

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - Amazing Spider-Man #637

The Week's Best, for the week of 7-5-10 to 7-11-10

K, so this is another edition that's going to be short on words because I've barely slept since Thursday, True Blood is going on in about fifteen minutes, and I've got a job interview tomorrow. If I knew how to do haiku, I'd limit my comments to that, but that would probably take longer...

The Week's Worst Comic Book - Brightest Day - The Atom Special

There was just absolutely no need for this book, at all. It doesn't even tie-in to the Brightest Day event, but they threw the banner on there because they knew they'd have to find a way to sucker people into buying this pointless effort about a character no one cares about, especially when a large part of DC's fan base is still railing at the pointless, senseless way they killed off the new Atom to bring the old one back.

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Avengers - The Children's Crusade #1

It's been a long wait, but Allan Heinberg and Jimmy Cheung are finally back on the characters they created, the Young Avengers, an d it was worth the wait. It feels like the creative team has never missed a beat, picking up a sub-plot from the first volume, one that is deeply important to both the Avengers and X-Men franchises, and running with it with great characterization, action, and stunningly beautiful art.

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - X-Force #28

The penultimate chapter of the "Second Coming" crossover event that has been running through the X-Men books for the last three months, this one features the final victory of the FiOS guy, as Cable is dead. I shouldn't make jokes about the death of one of my favorite characters, but, well, it wrote itself.

Mets Monday, Vol. 11

I'm keeping this one short because, well, I'm still counting today as part of the holiday weekend, I have a blog I still have to write for Heckling later tonight, and I'm just plain tired.

It was a rough week for the Mets, going 3-4 on a road trip against the Marlins and the Nationals, two teams it seems like they can just never beat, which is annoying. It didn't help, I'm sure, that Reyes has missed something like five games in a row now, and although he's back now, Pagan missed a few games in that road trip as well. Still, 3-4 is probably the second-best road trip we've had all season (try not to dwell on that idea), so it's not all bad.

Big home stand starting... well, technically it started fifteen minutes ago, with three games against the Cardinals and three against the Braves, both first place teams. Which is good, because for however many seasons in a row this is, the Mets seem to play to the level of the competition. Should be a fun week to watch.

And before I go, let's congratulate the Mets All-Stars: David Wright, who deserves every bit of it for the way he's been playing for the last six or seven weeks or so; and Jose Reyes, who might have only made the team because of an injury to someone else, but he's been playing up a storm as well.

The Week's Best, for the week of 6-28-10 to 7-4-10

For this Fourth of July edition, we're sticking to semi-clever one-liners because I'm busy watching Star Wars and even though I can pretty much recite the damn movies by now, I'm still watching.
So, away we go!

The Week's Worst Comic Book - Teen Titans #84

I haven't seen this much awful, hackneyed writing in a boring rehash of a plot that's been done to death since... well, since I watched Jonah Hex.

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Astonishing X-Men #34

Usually Warren Ellis is far too busy wanking himself over his knowledge of theoretical science, but he stops stroking long enough to throw some characters beats in here that, while they don't match at all what's going on in the main line of X-books, are still good enough to enjoy.

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - The Death of Dracula One-Shot

Suck it, Twilight. There's more bite and "real" vampire culture in this one issue than in all four of your books combined.

Fiction Fridays - Untitled Magic Story Part 2

Here's the second smidgen of this story I've started, there isn't much more because I spent a great deal of this week plotting and planning instead of writing, but here it is. Again, thoughts are welcome.

The plan was to catch him at his office right before he closed for the night, which he did at ten o’clock, but you know what they say about plans, right? Plans and whores, they both love to get fucked. By the time I got to his office, he was walking down the block, probably on his next assignment, which was no good for the poor bastard he was on his way to off, but it was no picnic for me, either; if he offed somebody after I had already been sent to take care of him, the Covenant would consider it a failure on my part, and as you can probably imagine, they aren’t too big on failure. I followed him down the block, casting a minor spell on myself to make me seem further away than I was if he happened to turn around… sort of an “objects in the rear view mirror” trick. If he gave me an opening, even the smallest one, I’d have to jump on it.

I have to say, I followed that squirrely bastard for what felt like miles, and all I could think was, who the hell walks this far anymore? It was right around then, though, that he turned into an alley. I don’t know if he was taking a shortcut or what, but I knew this was my chance. I dispelled the rear-view enchantment as I broke into the run, turning into the alley just as the Sultan reached the halfway point. “Hey, Bobby,” I called out to him.

He turned, and I had to give him credit, he didn’t show any visible signs that I had scared the crap out of him. “Who wants to know?” Why do they always say that? I hate clichés.

Time to drop the bomb. “The Covenant.” That got a reaction, alright. His entire body went rigid; that’s how scary those guys are. Maybe it would knock the fight out of him, save me some trouble. “I took a few steps closer, close enough for him to see me clearly. “You had to know what you’ve been doing was going to catch their attention sooner or later.”

“I was kind of hoping it was going to be later.” Another cliché. I was starting to hope he’d put up a fight, after all. The he took a step towards me, squinting a little. “I know you. You’re one of their lap dogs, aren’t you?” He shook his head. “I was kind of hoping I’d rate a magistrate by now.”

“Guess you never met one before.” Magistrates are the Covenant’s big dogs, decked out in armor that nullified any spell cast against them, but still let them throw spells around at whim. Kings of unfair, let me tell you, and I know from experience… but we’re nowhere near that yet. “Anyway, Bobby, I’m here to bring you to them. Let’s do it the easy way, huh? The Mets are on the west coast tonight and the game just started, I’d like to get to a bar and watch.”

“Oh, sure, I’ll come. You got me.” He took a step towards me, then leaned back, raised his hands over his head and threw them forward as he spat out the word Inflameo.

The fact that he was putting up a fight didn’t surprise me.

The fact that he was a pyro, though? That was an unpleasant surprise.