"Dumb and Dumber To" Early Review

If you enjoy the type of movie Dumb and Dumber To is (and if you're unfamiliar with the original Dumb and Dumber or the prequel Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd, the titles really tell you all you need to know), then you'll enjoy this movie, and if you don't, then you won't. It's as simple as that. And I know it's a total cop out to say that in a review but I wanted to get it out of the way now because it's totally true.

This movie is everything you expect it to be; there are no surprises (okay, yes, there are, because there are quite a few plot twists, but you know what I mean). Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels play Lloyd and Harry, of course, and the only difference between this performance and the first one other than how markedly older the characters look is that Daniels didn't seem as comfortable this time around. To me it looked very much like he was trying too hard while Carrey, on the other hand, slid right back into his old character like a glove. Even with what seemed like Daniels' discomfort to me, the guys still had great chemistry and their comedic timing is perfect. They have a strong supporting cast behind them as well, with Laurie Holden, Rob Riggle, and Kathleen Turner all doing great jobs. Riggle even does a great job twice, but you'll see what I mean. The weak spot is Rachel Melvin as Penny, the daughter they're looking for in the trailers. Her attempt to be a young female version of Harry and Lloyd is just annoying and overdone, and she's as painful to watch as she is nice to look at.

And if you've heard rumors that Jennifer Lawrence makes a cameo, she does, but unless you know it's coming you might just miss it...

The Farrelly brothers, Bobby and Peter, directed the movie from a screenplay they co-wrote with no less than four other writers (Sean Anders, Mike Cerrone, John Morris, and Bennett Yellin). While the story and script are obviously by no means smart, the jokes work much more often than they don't, and that's what everyone sees a movie like this for anyway. Plus, the plot is actually really good, with some surprising twists.

As I said before, if you enjoy this type of movie, you'll probably be more than happy with Dumb and Dumber To. This generally isn't my type of movie, and I'm still giving it 3 stars out of 5, so that should tell you something.
 
Dumb and Dumber To opens everywhere this coming Friday, November 14th.

NaNoWriMo 2014 - Lucifer Lockheed: The Devil's Daughter

Just taking the opportunity to actually do Fiction Friday post for a change, as it is easily one f my most neglected labels (which is a fairly major issue, considering the life path I've chosen for myself, but that's neither here nor there). I'm doing NaNoWriMo this year; that's National Novel Writing Month, in case you don't know. The goal is to write a 50,000 word story between November 1st and November 30th, and so far I'm chugging along. Not nearly fast enough to keep up with the needed word count just yet, but still trudging along. I'm posting the very rough prologue of my story here. I'm also adding a word count widget to the blog so my progress will be up there for all to say.

Because I'm still a child and peer pressure is a great motivator, obviously.

Anyway, wish me luck. And here we go with the prologue.

Did you ever wake up and know, just absolutely, no doubt about it know, that it was going to be a good day?

That's how I felt when I woke up that day. In fact, I didn't just know it was going to be a good day. I knew it was going to be a great day.  The red had settled into my hair nicely, the self-dye job from the night before combining with the expensive as hell salon styling to turn my hair from a mousy brown, clumpy mess into luxurious, vibrant curls of fire. I had had my doubts about a box job from CVS, but I couldn't afford a style and a dye from the salon, so I had to hope for the best. And that's what I got. I now had the kind of hair a guy would love to see in his lap... but we'll get to that later, hopefully.

No, fuck hopefully. We'll definitely get to that later. It's going to be a great day.

After the hair came the contacts. I had wanted to go full black, but freaking my parents out so much that they took me to therapy instead of school would seriously ruin the plan, so I went with a sooty shade of brown called "bistre." Not quite black but definitely the darkest brown I could find, and definitely an improvement over my boring old baby blues. Nobody was going to overlook little old common Lucille Fern Lockheed anymore, not with this hair and these eyes.

And of course, the outfit. It took months of saving all the money I could from the pitiful paycheck I got from my part-time job at the fro-yo dump, but I finally had enough to buy the kinds of things my parents would lock me in the basement for even thinking about wearing: short skirts, booty shorts, scandalously low-cut navel-baring shirts, and corsets. Oh, the corsets. Of course, I could never wear that out of the house; I'd have to wear the good little girl clothes mommy and daddy liked me to wear and make like all the other little sluts and change in school. No more fuzzy sweaters and baggy jeans for me, I'm over that shit. Puberty was very good to me when I hit fourteen, and three years later I was finally ready to let the world know it.

Specifically, the boys. One boy, in particular. One boy that would never look twice at Little Lucille Fern, but who won't be able to tear his eyes away from the brand new Lucifer Lockheed. I'll make damn sure he notices me.

I'll make sure they all notice me, and they'll never forget me.

Best. Day. Ever.

Of course, if you're reading this, it's totally possible it wasn't the best day ever, that shit went so wrong or I fucked up beyond the telling of it and I'm dead and you're all gathered here today to laugh your asses off at the dearly departed. Or maybe I'm not dead.

Maybe it's worse.

And before you ask, with the shit I'm dealing with, with what I'm planning to do, there is definitely such a thing as a fate worse than death. And if things go the way I'm planning them to, a whole lot of people are going to learn that. I just won't be one of them.

So maybe you're reading this because I did it all my way and I'm so popular and amazing and loved... or feared... that you need to know all this for the guaranteed blockbuster movie of my life Ben Affleck is directing. Or maybe it's the movie my father is making him direct about how awesome his little girl is; and I'm talking about my real father, not the asshole downstairs who keeps buying the goddamn pink fuzzy sweaters.

After all, getting Daddy's attention is half the reason I'm doing all this.

The other half is that it's just going to be so fucking fun.

Like I said, best day ever.

But first, the corset. The red one with the black trim today, I think. I tried it on last night and it undeniably hurt like a bitch getting it on; my curves aren’t exactly understated, after all, but it made my tits look amazing.  And they say beauty is pain, right? So it’s totally worth it.

Especially when my pain won’t be the only pain it causes.

Goodreads Book Review - Eleven Doctors, Eleven Stories

Eleven Doctors, Eleven Stories by Eoin Colfer

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I reviewed Neil Gaiman's short story of the Eleventh Doctor found in this book almost a year ago because that was something I just couldn't wait to read, but it took me a lot longer to get around to and then through the whole story. In a surprise twist for an anthology, I actually enjoyed all the stories here. The authors all feel like they "get" the voice of their particular Doctor right, and that goes a long way towards making the stories enjoyable. Aside from that, they're all smart science fiction stories, and that's always a treat as well. This book is a great read for fans of Doctor Who, but it would also be a fun read for just science fiction fans in general.



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Goodreads Book Review - The Slow Regard of Silent Things

The Slow Regard of Silent Things by Patrick Rothfuss

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I like the experimental nature of the story; one character, no dialogue, no real action, just a window into the soul really. And I enjoyed it for what it is, especially because I do love the character of Auri. Plus, Rothfuss has a way with words that is always marvelous to experience. Still, that being said, for what this book is, I can't help but wish he had taken the time he spent writing this and used it on more time writing the next installment in the Kingkiller Chronicle, because waiting for that is killing me.



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Goodreads Book Review - Turn Coat

Turn Coat by Jim Butcher

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I've been saying almost ad nauseam that Butcher is turning into a better and better writer with each installment in this series, and Turn Coat is no exception. In this eleventh installment he manages to take a character I have reviled ever since his first appearance way back in Storm Front and make me not just care about him but make me actually sad about his overall fate. That's a truly impressive feat. I was also happen to see that, while all the familiar story beats of a Dresden case are here, they're shaken up a bit and are less predictable. As always, Butcher's novels always leave me eager to get started on the next one.



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"Horns" Review - Written by Jim Herling

http://www.film-arcade.net/2014/10/horrorpalooza-2014-horns-review-written.html

Goodreads Book Review - Night of the Hunter

Night of the Hunter by R.A. Salvatore

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


By bringing the full cast of the Companions of the Hall back for this series, Salvatore has brought new (reincarnated?) life into a series that... well, didn't even really need it, because the series never stopped being amazing. Still, adding the old cast of characters to the more recent cast and combining them with a very resurgent drow threat makes for a very thrilling book. Besides the amazing, fun interplay of characters, the action scenes here are some of Salvatore's best, which is really saying something. There's one sequence involving a drow raid on a town that is one of the most pulse-pounding scenes I've ever read, and it really ratchets up the tension for where the story is going. Some people might think we're just retreading old ground here, and to an extent we are, but in a fresh way and with a whole new shine that really makes this an amazing read.



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