The Week's Best, for the week of 7-5-10 to 7-11-10

K, so this is another edition that's going to be short on words because I've barely slept since Thursday, True Blood is going on in about fifteen minutes, and I've got a job interview tomorrow. If I knew how to do haiku, I'd limit my comments to that, but that would probably take longer...

The Week's Worst Comic Book - Brightest Day - The Atom Special

There was just absolutely no need for this book, at all. It doesn't even tie-in to the Brightest Day event, but they threw the banner on there because they knew they'd have to find a way to sucker people into buying this pointless effort about a character no one cares about, especially when a large part of DC's fan base is still railing at the pointless, senseless way they killed off the new Atom to bring the old one back.

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Avengers - The Children's Crusade #1

It's been a long wait, but Allan Heinberg and Jimmy Cheung are finally back on the characters they created, the Young Avengers, an d it was worth the wait. It feels like the creative team has never missed a beat, picking up a sub-plot from the first volume, one that is deeply important to both the Avengers and X-Men franchises, and running with it with great characterization, action, and stunningly beautiful art.

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - X-Force #28

The penultimate chapter of the "Second Coming" crossover event that has been running through the X-Men books for the last three months, this one features the final victory of the FiOS guy, as Cable is dead. I shouldn't make jokes about the death of one of my favorite characters, but, well, it wrote itself.

Mets Monday, Vol. 11

I'm keeping this one short because, well, I'm still counting today as part of the holiday weekend, I have a blog I still have to write for Heckling later tonight, and I'm just plain tired.

It was a rough week for the Mets, going 3-4 on a road trip against the Marlins and the Nationals, two teams it seems like they can just never beat, which is annoying. It didn't help, I'm sure, that Reyes has missed something like five games in a row now, and although he's back now, Pagan missed a few games in that road trip as well. Still, 3-4 is probably the second-best road trip we've had all season (try not to dwell on that idea), so it's not all bad.

Big home stand starting... well, technically it started fifteen minutes ago, with three games against the Cardinals and three against the Braves, both first place teams. Which is good, because for however many seasons in a row this is, the Mets seem to play to the level of the competition. Should be a fun week to watch.

And before I go, let's congratulate the Mets All-Stars: David Wright, who deserves every bit of it for the way he's been playing for the last six or seven weeks or so; and Jose Reyes, who might have only made the team because of an injury to someone else, but he's been playing up a storm as well.

The Week's Best, for the week of 6-28-10 to 7-4-10

For this Fourth of July edition, we're sticking to semi-clever one-liners because I'm busy watching Star Wars and even though I can pretty much recite the damn movies by now, I'm still watching.
So, away we go!

The Week's Worst Comic Book - Teen Titans #84

I haven't seen this much awful, hackneyed writing in a boring rehash of a plot that's been done to death since... well, since I watched Jonah Hex.

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Astonishing X-Men #34

Usually Warren Ellis is far too busy wanking himself over his knowledge of theoretical science, but he stops stroking long enough to throw some characters beats in here that, while they don't match at all what's going on in the main line of X-books, are still good enough to enjoy.

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - The Death of Dracula One-Shot

Suck it, Twilight. There's more bite and "real" vampire culture in this one issue than in all four of your books combined.

Fiction Fridays - Untitled Magic Story Part 2

Here's the second smidgen of this story I've started, there isn't much more because I spent a great deal of this week plotting and planning instead of writing, but here it is. Again, thoughts are welcome.

The plan was to catch him at his office right before he closed for the night, which he did at ten o’clock, but you know what they say about plans, right? Plans and whores, they both love to get fucked. By the time I got to his office, he was walking down the block, probably on his next assignment, which was no good for the poor bastard he was on his way to off, but it was no picnic for me, either; if he offed somebody after I had already been sent to take care of him, the Covenant would consider it a failure on my part, and as you can probably imagine, they aren’t too big on failure. I followed him down the block, casting a minor spell on myself to make me seem further away than I was if he happened to turn around… sort of an “objects in the rear view mirror” trick. If he gave me an opening, even the smallest one, I’d have to jump on it.

I have to say, I followed that squirrely bastard for what felt like miles, and all I could think was, who the hell walks this far anymore? It was right around then, though, that he turned into an alley. I don’t know if he was taking a shortcut or what, but I knew this was my chance. I dispelled the rear-view enchantment as I broke into the run, turning into the alley just as the Sultan reached the halfway point. “Hey, Bobby,” I called out to him.

He turned, and I had to give him credit, he didn’t show any visible signs that I had scared the crap out of him. “Who wants to know?” Why do they always say that? I hate clichés.

Time to drop the bomb. “The Covenant.” That got a reaction, alright. His entire body went rigid; that’s how scary those guys are. Maybe it would knock the fight out of him, save me some trouble. “I took a few steps closer, close enough for him to see me clearly. “You had to know what you’ve been doing was going to catch their attention sooner or later.”

“I was kind of hoping it was going to be later.” Another cliché. I was starting to hope he’d put up a fight, after all. The he took a step towards me, squinting a little. “I know you. You’re one of their lap dogs, aren’t you?” He shook his head. “I was kind of hoping I’d rate a magistrate by now.”

“Guess you never met one before.” Magistrates are the Covenant’s big dogs, decked out in armor that nullified any spell cast against them, but still let them throw spells around at whim. Kings of unfair, let me tell you, and I know from experience… but we’re nowhere near that yet. “Anyway, Bobby, I’m here to bring you to them. Let’s do it the easy way, huh? The Mets are on the west coast tonight and the game just started, I’d like to get to a bar and watch.”

“Oh, sure, I’ll come. You got me.” He took a step towards me, then leaned back, raised his hands over his head and threw them forward as he spat out the word Inflameo.

The fact that he was putting up a fight didn’t surprise me.

The fact that he was a pyro, though? That was an unpleasant surprise.

Mets Monday, Vol. 10

It was another good week for the boys from Queens, going 4-2 against two good American League teams. Right now, the Mets are just half a game out of first place in the division, and still have the lead in the wild card race.

Is it just me, or has John Niese become a damn good pitcher since coming back from the disabled list? They've won every game he's started since he's been back! He's been a great counter-point to Johan Santana, who has kind of been a mess lately. Less strikeouts per nine innings than ever before, more walks, shorter outings. I don't know if this whole mess about him having an affair or rape or whatever it was is bothering him or not. Now, obviously, I don't condone rape, but I don't think it was rape, since nobody heard of it for how long since it happened, and the case was closed anyway. If it was him having an affair, that's none of my business and I honestly don't give a shit as long as he pitches the way we pay him to pitch, which he hasn't been. That whole mess needs to get sorted out.

Luckily, between Niese and the rest of the starting rotation, the team seems to have it covered. The offense has been on fire lately, and that's been with Pagan sitting out the last four games or so, and even yesterday, with Reyes having an 0-fer. This team is fun as hell to watch, and if they can keep going like this, it's going to be a fun summer...

The Week's Best, for the week of 6-21-10 to 6-27-10

Very tired. No sleep this weekend. No more words. Just pictures. Enjoy.

The Week's Worst Comic Book - Wolverine Origins #49

The Week's Best Comic Book Runner-Up - Amazing Spider-Man #635

The Week's Best Comic Book Winner - Superman #700

Fiction Fridays - Untitled Magic Story

I've decided to start this new weekly column, Fiction Fridays, partly as a way to get some feedback on what I'm writing and partly as a way to keep me writing. With that in mind, here's the first little snippet of something I've started... I'm not sure what, if anything, it's going to amount to, but here it is.


The first thing I should tell you is that Harry Potter is bullshit. Wait, no, that’s not the first thing I should tell you. Sorry; after everything I’ve been through in my short life… I’m younger than I look, trust me… the mind starts to get things a little jumbled sometimes. I’ll do my best to keep things relatively linear for you.

So, first thing: magic is real.

Second thing: Harry Potter is bullshit. Magic is something you’re born with. You either have it or you don’t and there’s no fancy school filled with friendly old people with beards and funny hats who teach you what to say while you daintily wave a wand in the air. Fucking wands. Who thought up that nonsense? It’s all about words of powers and hand gestures, and for some things, you don’t even need those. For the simplest spells, just the thought, or even the sheer intent, is enough. And for the most powerful mages, even the harder feats can be accomplished through sheer force of will. Sounds sweet, right, all that power? You’d think so, but you’d be dead wrong. First you have to be able to pay the toll magic demands on you, and if you can do that, well, bastards that powerful catch the eye of the Covenant, and once they have their eye on you, you only get one of two endings…

That’s where this whole mess started for me. I was on a job for the Covenant. Before you ask, no, I’m not powerful enough to get their attention, at least not in that “one of two endings” way I just mentioned. But I am powerful enough, and, more importantly, skilled enough to do some work for them from time to time. Like they say, it pays the bills, and every now and then they’ll toss me a scroll that I might be lucky enough to use to pick up some new trick.

Gotta feed the magic, after all.

So there I was, tracking down this idiot who called himself the Sultan of Sunset Park. Obviously, I was dealing with a real high-level intellect here. The Sultan… his real name was Bob Leviwitz… had been selling his talents to blanks, people without magic. There’s nothing wrong with that, as a rule, mages do it all the time; fortune tellers, palm readers, psychics. Some of them are scam artists, and some of them have real magic, selling it to make a few quick bucks. That’s fine, most people think they’re all full of crap anyway. The problem here was that Bobby was selling himself as an assassin, and that’s a no-no. Too many blanks start dying too close together, it starts drawing attention, and that’s when the Covenant gets involved.


So there it is, whatever it is. Feedback of any kind would be appreciated.