Retroblog: Marc & Chris - A Two Act Love Story

So here's another blog from my Myspace days. This one details two conversations that took place at Kaplan back in 2007 that really illustrate the illicit love my friend Marc has for my friend Chris... a love, I must mention under penalty of death, that is not returned. Best of all, they're in the form of scenes!

Scene 1 - Jim, Ray, and Marc by Marc's desk.

R: So Marc, see any leaves change colors lately?

J: Huh?

M: No no no!

J: What now?

R: Want me to blow your spot, Marc?

M: Shut up, shut up!

J: What the fuck is going on?

M: Shut up! No!

R: Marc made a proposal to one of our friends; I can't tell you who because he doesn't want you to write a blog about it.

J: Did Marc ask Chris out?

R: He invited him to Maine to eat lobster and watch the leaves change with him.

Jimmy's face does something wholly unnatural. Marc starts groaning. Ray literally runs away cackling.

And, scene!

Scene 2 - The following night. Jimmy walks to Chris' desk and finds Marc there sitting with him.

J (to C): He asking you out again?

C: Actually, he did just ask me to go to Cancun with him.

J: Ah, so the wedding is in Maine and the honeymoon is in Cancun, Marc?

M: Can I come to the Halloween party guys?

C: Nice segue, Marc.

J: Yeah, way to change the subject. What would you come as?

M: I could be Muy Thai.

J: You're going to be a martial art?

C: You know, if you could pull off being the embodiment of an abstract, I'd be impressed.

M: No, I mean like from Street Fighter, I could be Sagat.

J: Please, you'd need three of you to be Sagat. You're more of a Dhalsim.

M: What? I'm mad diesel, yo.

Jimmy palmfaces, Jabba laughs maniacally and calls Ray to leave a voicemail about what Marc just said. Then they proceed to try and talk for awhile without Marc about unrelated subjects, until...

M (leaning over to C): So, when are we getting laid.?

J: Oh, look. Time to get back to work. Have fun lovebirds.

C: Fuck you, Jim.

And scene again.


  1. I laughed so hard I almost passed out at my desk. I'm not reading this any more.

  2. Damn, Ray, it shouldn't have been that funny, you were there! lol

  3. It was totally taken out of context! I said when were we going to get laid implying that when were we going to get chicks! This is defamation, libel and slander of the Pongpamorn's good name! :)

  4. I think you need to look up "good" in the dictionary.

  5. two things:

    1. Ray you laugh and pass out laughing at least 4x per day and mostly at your own jokes. :P

    2. I had to invent a new word to describe this.. Does Hilarisad do it? Not sure yet, I have to mull it over.

  6. As the proud owner of a totally useless English degree that I feel serves no purpose except to let me create new words, I'm totally prepared to ratify "hilarisad" on this one.

  7. omg. I've heard these before, and it still is as hilisad as the first time.

    a few things? Marc, if these conversations were taken out of context, what about the other 500 times you've tried to hit on Chris? And I believe your "good name" was defiled upon you leaving the birth canal when the doctor put you right in the closet

  8. Oh and Jim, with all the mentions of Marc, i'm beginning to think you're a little interested in the boy.

  9. Hey man, I just recognize comedy goldmines when I see them.

    I mean, let's be honest, if I was going to go gay, I'd do a lot better than Marc.


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