It's No Angel

I'm going to be honest here. The original Charlie's Angels wasn't very good. Face it. The only reason it was popular and successful was because it featured female leads in an action program, a rarity for it's time, and it was probably the sexiest thing going on TV in those days. So the idea of remaking sounds pretty good, right? You know, if you ignore those godawful Drew Barrymore movies...

"What's a good plate with nothing on it?" has never been more relevant.

Except there's a few problems with that idea. For one thing, in the days of True Blood, Spartacus, Shameless, and anything else on premium cable, nothing on ABC is going to be nearly sexy enough for someone in grammar school, let alone the rest of the population. For another thing, between the X-Files, Buffy, Alias, and how many other shows, female action leads are almost becoming more common than male leads. So any potential remake made in 2011 already lacks the two things the original had going for it... and then you make Drew Barrymore executive producer?

Yeah, this will go well.

Even the second Bosley thinks this is a bad idea... and he's dead!

I made it through about thirty-five minutes of tonight's premier of the new Charlie's Angels before I had to turn it off. Aside from a recycled plot seen in just about any police/detective program in the history of, like, ever, the acting was truly horrible. Of course, I don't know if I can blame that on the cast; after all, I don't think anyone can deliver gems like "We're not cops, we're angels," and "We're angels, not saints," with any kind of talent and conviction. All of which is a shame because it makes it completely unwatchable, which means I'll have to miss the gorgeous Minka Kelly on a weekly basis.

Reason #18,769 why I hate Derek fucking Jeter.

It's a toss-up between whether this awful excuse for television or the steaming mess that is The Playboy Club will get cancelled first. So far, out of five new shows now, 2 Broke Girls is the only one that's made it to the second week.

I weep for network television.